The Jug is Up!

The time has come for breastfeeding to be over.

I have loved and will cherish every moment that I spent nursing Cody. It is truly one of god's miracles and the most beautiful, natural thing.

However, my little Mr. is no longer able to get full from breastmilk. One day I nursed him for an hour and a half and it STILL wasn't enough. I think part of the problem is that I did not increase my caloric intake or eat enough. While I have been at home I've only been eating 1-2 meals a day. Also, we introduced formula fairly early and Cody was able to get fuller faster and therefore get to sleep sooner which he enjoyed.

I don't regret any decisions we've made because Cody is a healthy, happy baby. I'm thankful he was able to breastfeed and take a bottle.

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I'm finishing this post a week after I began writing it (on the 6th, today is the 13th) so we've totally switched gears now. It's definitely different having all these bottles to keep clean and packing up the diaper bag is a whole new ball game. On a positive note, Cody is doing very well with his formula. In the beginning we had trouble finding the right one. We started with Similac Advance which was fine but he was gassy- we've since determined that he is just a gassy baby, and then tried Similac Soy- I thought he would have trouble with milk-based formulas since he was very fussy with breastfeeding after I had drank milk; but the soy made be throw up. Next up was Similac Sensitive which made him constipated. Dealing with all of this and considering stopping breastfeeding was really hard on me. I hated the guilt I was dealing with. The pediatrician was ready to switch to Alimentum which is what Emma had to take and costs about $180-$200 a month. I said wait a minute, I've only tired Similac formulas, can you recommend one from another brand? Her answer was the one I wanted. Enfamil Gentlease. I knew of it because that's what my brother and SIL are feeding Drew.

It took a couple of days but we started to see an improvement and in no time Cody was pooping normally and much less gassy. He's still Mr. farts-a-lot but now we never have to give him Mylicon whereas we were giving it to him with every bottle before.

Deciding to stop breastfeeding and then actually doing so was really hard for me. It's incredibly difficult to walk away from something so intimate and also beneficial for both of us. One night, the 5th I think? I just finally made up my mind that we needed to be done. I felt so much better instantly without that huge pressure on me. Over the next few days I stopped pumping and nursing all together. I had already dramatically decreased the number of times during the day that I was nursing and pumping so I didn't feel the need to wean too gradually. The first three days were the worst. The most painful part is behind me but I know we are far from being done.

When I would start to Google for websites with insight about healing techniques etc. all I was finding were websites that have you question your decision to supplement or stop breastfeeding. They were full of sweet pictures of nursing babies and that made it so much more painful for me. But here I am a week later and Mommy and Cody are doing great.