It's Not Just Me

In my brain I know I'm not alone. And no, I don't mean the voices. :) But sometimes it's nice to know in your heart that you're not alone in the way you think and feel.

At 9PM on May 1st, David and I were enjoying our Sunday night routine. The children were sleeping and we were folding laundry, ok actually I was folding laundry and he was either working on his fantasy baseball team or playing Words With Friends, but in fairness David does the laundry and I fold it. Anyway we were relaxing and had just sat down to watch Celebrity Apprentice. I checked something on my phone and saw via a Facebook post that President Obama would be making an announcment at 10:30ET. I asked David if he had heard anything and we immediately began surfing the internet and news channels. Because obviously this was important for the President to be breaking in late on a Sunday evening.

10:30ET came and went and it wasn't long before I saw posts on Facebook claiming that the announcement was the Osama Bin Laden was dead. We heard the news first on CNN and FINALLY when the President came on. My first reaction was, "Good!" quickly followed by fear and wondering "What's next?" in contrast to my husband's thoughts which immediatley went to bringing our troops home.

It was amazing to watch the crowds begin to gather in front of the white house. It was one of those times you see somewhere you've visited but it looks so different at that juncture.

Eventually it started to sink in that, for the moment, everything is ok. No buildings were crashing down and life was going on. While that made me feel a bit better, I still struggled to understand the masses that were gathering to celebrate. I observed how David was reacting, but we both sat quietly and took it all in. I called my father who was in Houston helping his sister and father prepare for my grandfather's pacemaker replacement surgery the next morning. Sure enough they were out eating a late dinner and not tuned in to Fox News (that would come later.) Since my mom was home alone I called her to make sure she was watching.

Even as I'm writing this now it's a struggle to find the words. That instantaneous argument you have with yourself, "Is there something wrong w/me that I'm not rejoicing with my neighbors?" David and I continued with what we were doing. We finished watching celebrity apprentice and were annoyed that we had to google who was fired because the broadcast was interrupted. We stayed up late watching reporters weigh in and found ourselves not going to bed until after 12:30AM.

The next day I was still bewildered at the racy comments, photos and insights all celebrating Osama's death littering my Facebook feed. But, I'm not the only one:

My SIL shared this link (http://http//thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/justintaylor/2011/05/02/how-should-christians-think-about-the-death-of-osama-bin-laden/) and I enjoyed reading it and the one below.

http://www.dennyburk.com/some-thoughts-on-the-death-of-bin-laden/

Both sources offer thoughts to ponder how Christians are handling the killing of Osama Bin Laden. Before I go any further let me offer this, I am a proud American and have not forgotten the horror I witnessed live on 9/11. I want nothing more than a safe, free, prosperous and God-fearing America where we can raise our families in peace. I'm also human. I want justice. I want to put an end to terrorism and am incredibly thankful for the brave men and women and their families who sacrifice so much so that I can sit here and write about my ambiguous response to such a glorious display of bravery.